A star for Team Canada at the 2016 FIBA U17 Women’s World Championships. A cornerstone of the University of Buffalo (UB) Women’s Basketball team that made a run at a National Championship. One of the hardest workers you’ll meet. A perpetual smile. This is Hanna Hall—at least the one most people see. But there’s another side to her—a side that battles mental health every single day. Few people ever saw this side of her, but that all changed when she shared her story with the world.
Andrew: When did you first notice a shift in your mental health?
Hanna: I was just on the biggest stage, starting for Team Canada and winning a bronze medal, but then I came off that and went to college and it was a completely new environment. I went from the top to the bottom really quickly. I definitely wasn’t ready for that. I loved it, though. I loved every second of it. I loved my coach, team, and teammates, but it was difficult not to play much. It brought out this competitive side in me that I’d never had before. I’ve always been a competitor, but I wanted to play so bad and just wanted to get better. It turned into an unhealthy cycle of working out and training, which is a common thing that actually happens a lot among athletes but is not really seen. Then I developed a pretty serious eating disorder and was diagnosed with anorexia. It got to the point that it was either gain weight or never play basketball again.
A: When did you tell your teammates? What was their reaction?
H: Before my sophomore season, my coaches and I decided I would take time off because I needed to gain weight and focus on my mental health if I actually wanted to play. So that’s when I sat down with my team and explained to them what was going on. But even at that time, I was so unaware of what I was really going through. It’s one of those things that you really just don’t know until you take the time to understand it. Like when you’re in sixth grade, you’re not going to be like, “oh man, I have OCD,” unless someone’s telling you and you’re really looking into it. Mental health isn’t that black or white. So that’s when I explained to them what I was going through, and it definitely made us really close. We all really came together. It opened up a lot of conversations with my teammates and gave them a safe platform to speak.
A: What were the next few months like?
H: I had a really good support system and was able to kind of get through it. I took some time off that summer to take care of my body and my mental health and then continued to see a therapist and counselor. That following year ended up being a great season for our team and me; our team played really well. We had a big follow-up season after my freshman year.
A: Is that when you decided to tell your story?
H: Yes, after my sophomore season. I am a faithful follower. It was on my spirit to release my story and help other athletes who were probably going through similar things but couldn’t talk about it. So I kind of changed paths and realized that advocating for athletes and using my platform was something I was really passionate about.
We had a great video guy who was able to capture what I wanted to do. I wasn’t saying that I’ve overcome mental health. I struggle and will struggle with this probably for my whole life, but I’m going to be completely open about it, so someone else can be too—that was the point of it. I think that’s what the message became. That was right after that season, and I was like, I don’t know if we’re ever going to have a season like this again. This is an opportunity for me to tell my story from a platform.
A: Did you ever think about leaving basketball behind for good?
H: Honestly, no. I think that basketball kind of saved my life in a way because it allowed me to have something to work toward. Without basketball, I wouldn’t have prioritized my health enough to actually get the help I needed, which is why eating disorders have the highest mortality rates among all mental health disorders.
It wasn’t until this past season (2021) when there was obviously some back and forth in my mind. My body was fatigued. My brain was so fatigued. COVID fatigued me 10 years in advance of what I wanted to be. It wasn’t until this year that I made the decision to step away from the game. I honestly don’t even feel like I quit basketball. If it comes back to my life in a few years, then it does. If it doesn’t, it doesn’t, you know what I mean? I’ll always be around it, and I’ll always love the game, but I was ready to take the next step.
A: Now that you don’t have basketball, what strategies are you using to take care of your mental health?
H: I still carry over a lot of the stuff I did before with self-care. I’m really big into yoga and meditation. I’ve been an athlete for so long, I’m trying to learn how to exercise like a normal person, which has been hard because it’s always been strenuous training. So now it’s about being able to do stuff that just feels good. I’m still seeing counselors, therapists, and still trying to rewire my brain from the regular life of an athlete.
A: Looking back, how has your view of your mental health changed?
H: I had to change the perspective from “maybe I won’t ever be back to 100%” because it really is a part of you, but being able to change that perspective and celebrate it is something that I want to do rather than see it as an illness. So it’s accepting it and using the help to change your perspective rather than seeing it as such an awful thing.
A: Have other people opened up to you since you told your story?
H: Yeah, all the time. People come up to me or message me on Instagram and tell me what they’re going through and that they didn’t realize how serious it was until they saw my story. A lot of people say that they didn’t think I could go through that. I’m always like, “I’m a human, just like you.” So it’s being able to normalize it. That’s why it’s so important for athletes and celebrities to speak about it; because we have a platform.
A: What’s next for you?
H: I’m not quite sure yet. I’m working with Canada Basketball on the communications and marketing side of things, which has been really cool because I have a big interest in nonprofit work. Eventually, I want to take my own ideas and see where I can go with them. But right now, it’s really about giving myself time to transition out of sports and figure things out. I’ve been keeping it all open. I’m just going to keep using my platform.
I really love social media and advocating for things. I’m doing a lot of work around NIL (Name, Image, and Likeness), talking to different court members with other athletes, so that was really cool as well. That’s kind of where I’m at right now—I’m just continuing to use my voice and transitioning out of being an athlete to being an everyday person.
Want to learn more about Hanna’s story? Check out her interview with ESPN during Mental Health Awareness Month in 2020.